The Naava Kodesh staff had the tremendous zechus to meet with the Mashgiach of Beis Medrash Govoha of Lakewood (BMG) Harav Abba Brudny Shlit”a, to discuss chinuch pertaining to frum families moving to Eretz Yisrael. Additionally, the Mashgiach shared insights and eitzos on being Koneh Eretz Yisrael.
A family decides they want to move to Eretz Yisrael — they are ready to start their journey, and have not yet begun the application process. How should they begin to plan the chinuch aspect of making Aliyah?
I think the most important thing is that they should spend time in Eretz Yisrael. Not just a few days, or a week for yomim tovim. They need to spend a summer here. Every family is different — a family with older children needs more time; with smaller children, less. The main purpose is that they become acquainted with Eretz Yisrael. They need to get a feeling for it.
Step one: A family has to have a real desire to be in Eretz Yisrael. If you come here and you really want it, you’ll be able to overcome the hardships — and hardships don’t necessarily have to do with Eretz Yisrael. Any move has hardships. A family moving from New York to L.A. will also face difficulties. Someone from New York who moves to London will encounter hardships. Any change is hard, especially a change in culture.
So the first thing a family has to consider is: Are they connected to Eretz Yisrael? Is it important to them? Do they realize that it’s the Promised Land — that it’s Eretz haKodesh. Everyone knows Eretz Yisrael has two names — the Holy Land and the Promised Land. If people have that awareness and they cultivate that hashkafa as part of the chinuch of the family, then they will spend time in Eretz Yisrael, becoming accustomed to it, letting that connection grow.
Step two: Once they’re in Eretz Yisrael, they’ll have the opportunity to meet people, see schools, and identify which schools are closest to what they’re used to. If they can make the jump from a cheder in New York, New Jersey, or wherever they’re coming from, they’ll find that the school system is not so different from where they are now. Many times, it’s actually much more similar than it seems. It’s the same lebedige kids — the differences are mostly external.
Similarly, you have to know at what level they’re coming in. If a 4th grader is coming from a school in Brooklyn or Lakewood, and he’s on the same level as a boy in a cheder here — that’s something important to assess. But those are already the details.
People have to realize: moving from one country to another is a major event. If you have a family of 5 or 6 children — boys and girls ranging in age from 3-17 — you have to be sure it works for the entire family. If it’s a young family and all the children are in early elementary school, it’s less of an issue.
Mainstreaming the family is very important. There are families where the parents never learned to speak Hebrew, yet the children pick it up in cheder. It’s very likely that the children may ridicule the parents — either openly or behind their backs. This is what happened in America after the war. The children spoke fluent English, and the parents spoke broken English mixed with Yiddish. Back then, people had more derech eretz. Today, things are different. It’s very important that the parents understand they must be able to speak Hebrew and not to end up in a situation where the kids feel smarter than their parents.
So what can parents do to prepare for their eventual move?
They need to realize that what you say in bentching every day, “Nodeh lecha Hashem Elokeinu al shehinchalta l’avoseinu eretz chemda tova urechava”, has to become part of their set of beliefs. It’s not lip service. To come to Eretz Yisrael without that understanding — that being here is no different than putting on tefillin — is missing the foundation. What are you doing here without that havana? The only way to feel that you’re in your place — not a foreign country — is with that understanding.
Most of Acheinu Bnei Yisrael know of the tremendous ma’alos (spiritual advantages) of Eretz Yisrael, but how do we connect?
So how do we create that netiyah (pull, connection)?
In the old days, if someone had a bottle of wine from Eretz Yisrael, it was chashuv — you’d keep it for a vort. I remember when I was a child, we found among our grandparents’ belongings a small bag of sand from Eretz Yisrael — they wanted to be buried in it. If someone came from Eretz Yisrael, it was a yom tov! The chashivus was felt! Today, that feeling has been commercialized. So the only way might be to spend time in Israel.
If you ask me: If a family wants a way to connect to Eretz Yisrael, rather than the many vacations we take that have a real price tag and cost real time, they should be spent in Eretz Yisrael. No Florida, no Europe. No kivrei tzaddikim tours in Europe. Every vacation should be in Eretz Yisrael. That’s the way to start.
If a young family has made that connection over years — if every trip longer than 72 hours was in Eretz Yisrael — if the vacation budget is only spent in Eretz Yisrael, then that family has already built a connection. Once someone sees that their temporary living is here in Eretz Yisrael — and they develop that — then they can think about permanent living.
Don’t rent a $25,000 bungalow for the summer — spend that money in Eretz Yisrael. That’s the way to do it.
Eretz Yisrael can be visited as a most unique collection of history, our history. Yet, it isn’t an experience that connects me to my rich spiritual heritage. If I stand by the Kosel and imagine bringing Bikurim- that is an inspirational moment. When visiting a farm, imagine practicing matnos aniyim, shmita, etc.. Such experiences can ignite the appreciation of Eretz Chemda Tova that Hashem bequeathed to our Forefathers.
I’m sure that if this would become the model — that all vacations are in Eretz Yisrael — there would be a significant uptick in Aliyah. This would generate the connection to Eretz Yisrael.
Now, it’s clear that many people should not come. The poskim in Even HaEzer say there are certain criteria for moving. That’s clear. But the first thing to realize is that everyone should want to come to Eretz Yisrael. Because it’s Eretz chemda tova urechava. That’s a chiyuv. That’s part of Yiddishkeit — to have chavivus and a desire to come to Eretz Yisrael. Does that mean everyone can come? No. Most people can’t for various reasons: family obligations, parnassah, children. Practically, for most people it doesn’t work. But you need to have the cheshek (desire), the chavivus for Eretz Yisrael in order to be able to come. With that mindset, the return to our Homeland will be much more meaningful and everlasting.
